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What if I had signed up for Ok Cupid in February or March instead of January, and Allyn wasn’t on the site anymore?
What if he had met someone else or given up and decided to take a break from dating?
We are silly and insane if we get caught up in the “how we met” story that we forget the rest of the details. To be honest, I was a bit nervous about online dating before I ended up taking the plunge and signing up for an account. I knew that the very first time Allyn saw me, he thought I was beautiful.
What will matter in 5 years from now is how we thought to build one another. It was a few weeks into 2014 and I was feeling ready for new beginnings. That night, I went home and created a profile on Ok Cupid. Through the way he described himself and his life, I felt like I got a good sense of him. I felt sure that his answer would be, “Yes, Dallas Woodburn. “I would have been too shy to just walk up to a complete stranger and ask her out.” Even if that stranger was me? Even if that stranger was me, his future wife, in her tennis shoes and loose-fitting jeans, casually browsing the organic vegetable display.
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more about kate from tbilis It is easy to feel me if you are on my wave, maybe that is why I give so less descriptions.
I met a guy on a plane once, when I was flying to Indianapolis from LAX to return to grad school after spending the holidays at home.
Last week, one of my favorite writers Hannah Brencher published a wonderful blog post about online dating titled “Why It Doesn’t Matter If You Met (Or Meet) Online.” I loved her words against the stigma some still feel about meeting online. No hint of the questioning inflection I sometimes heard in my own voice – “We met online? In the movies and in books and TV shows, people tend to meet not online, but in line — at the post office, at the drugstore, at the bank. I once asked Allyn if, had our carts bumped into each other in a grocery store, would he have started up a conversation.
My heart especially felt drawn to this final graph: It doesn’t matter where we meet. Hannah’s words got me thinking about my own dating experiences, both in person and online. In our first weeks and months of dating, when Allyn and I would introduce each other to various people in our lives and they would ask how we met, I was always impressed with the matter-of-fact way he would say, “We met online.” He wouldn’t beat around the bush. They meet sitting next to each other on public transportation and running in the park. This was after we had been together a while, after we had said, “I love you” and after I had learned that parrot-on-his-shoulder photo was from a trip he took with his mom to Honduras.
What if I hadn’t decided to browse profiles that night, and I had never come across his cute smile?
Even though we met online, there are still a million ways we could have missed each other. Plus, a first date will always be a first date, whether you met online or at the dog park or through mutual friends.
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